WONDERS of HAZELNUT. ♥

i miss you so much Tita, help me stay strong pls, watch over me, always and always. I love you and i miss yoooou so much!!!!

Trust the process, in everything you do, do it with God. In God we trust. I kept whispering this to myself everyday as a reminder that truly all things will be possible, and this kept me going because after everything, I am still here. But today, I felt overwhelmed, I had to cry it all out to lessen the weight I was feeling. Thank you Sat, for listening, it meant so much to me to know that someone was there to listen. And yes, aral na ulit love kasi tapos ka na magbreak down. Papasa ako! Tiwala lang, okay?

Not to be negative but right now, im feeling down, little bit way way down. Yes, there's always that pain knowing that he never really makes that effort to be close to me, where in fact he was the one who left me, I was the one who forced myself to come back to his life and still I get this. Sometimes its just frustrating, depressing and i cant even explain the mixed emotion but we get used to it, just sliding that tiny feeling of hoping he might later on show up the way he should. hazelnut, walang magiipon ng sama ng loob! bye

im here just because, yes just because i need to put my thoughts somewhere. i cannot afford any more space for any distractions that is not supposed to be there in the first place. and i guess i just got carried away again. again hazelnut, sometimes you dont fail to disapppont nu? so yes maybe im just here to a little bit scold myself and now im quite on my way to telling myself again that u gonna be alright gurl!!! priorites!!! and yes, felt drained today, physically mentally emotionally socially in so many ways, let's rest na nga para later aral ulit. ang dali dali sumuko promise, pero wag ka susuko hazelnut pls! you have to try, para sa pangarap! para sa mga taong mas matutulungan later on!! tibay ng loob now, iyak later kasi kinaya mo!! goodnight love! somehow along the way, life creeps in to remind me how people come and go and to tell me again to be more selective of the people whom i try to let into my life, i hope they stop from sucking in all the energy and love i stil...

just wanted to share how sad it felt to be reminded of a bad memory, but decided eventually to put this one here because at the same time, I knew from that moment I woke up that somehow I am in control now and I am no longer in that dark place. But I've also realized the trauma it gave me feels so heavy, because honestly I am still scared and most of the time, I would always to choose now to isolate myself, the thought of people leaving in the most unexpected way scares me so much, so at the back of my mind, I dont want people having that chance or oppurtunity to do it again. but yes, I'm praying for my healing that eventually I will forgive people and forgive myself for choosing to be in that situation before. I am slowly learning to listen to what will truly make me happy and at peace. okay bye love, aral na ulit ako. I hope maging Doctor na ako sa April, I am currently contemplating on going back to Sagada alone. Malay natin matuloy. To having more plans to look forward...